


Countdown To Insanity

by aug325



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bathing/Washing, Buried Alive, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hidan (Naruto) Swears, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-06
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-15 07:51:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10552746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aug325/pseuds/aug325
Summary: Konan rescues Hidan from his grave Shikamaru made for him. Hidan's mind and body is shattered and Konan needs to pick up the pieces of his damaged body and psyche. Rated M for nudity, gore and implied innuendo and for later chapters. This will continue. Multi-Chaptered. Hidakona.





	1. Countdown to Insanity

……………………………………  
….  
…  
I opened my eyes weakly. Then I widened them in surprise, and slight panic. I couldn't see! I blinked a couple of times…. Then I was aware of something crushing my head. Something heavy. I felt pain all over my body. Excruciating pain. Then, I realized, I was in the dark.   
Was it nighttime?   
I figured I shouldn't panic. I waited for my eyes to adjust to the crushing darkness, and even then, it was hard to see. Rocks. I was surrounded by rocks….. I tried moving, then I realized, I couldn't feel my hands… or my legs… I tried moving my head, but that got me no where. I was paralyzed as well? I moved my eyes, and cringed. One of my eyes was swollen…. Probably from that giant fucking rock on my head. I closed that one, and used my good eye. Then I gasped. I saw a severed foot next to my head in the darkness, then… as I stared longer at it… I realized it was mine. My foot. What was going on? Was that my foot? Was that why I couldn't move my legs? Where's the rest of my body? What is it with all these rocks? What happened? Was I dead? What was going on? None of my questions gave an answer. I struggled to remember… anything before then, why I was here….. but I couldn't…. Nothing came to mind…. Before then…. There was nothing…..  
I forced myself to take deep breaths to calm down… but the pain of doing so hurt… So I stopped. I figured I had a little slight case of amnesia due to that fucking rock crushing my head and puffing up my eyelid… There were only a few things I could remember…. I knew….. that I was immortal…. How? I did not know… but I knew I was unable to die. So… me being trapped in a hole with severed body parts is actually common place. And I knew…. I liked to fucking curse….. a lot…. But those are the only two things I could remember about myself. As for my name or past experiences…. Or past relationships…. There was nothing. But there was nothing I could do about it. I sighed. The pain hurt. I closed my eyes, and fell asleep, surprised how easily exhausted I was… But I guess being body parts being crushed by thousands of boulders does that to ya…  
…………………………………………………………………..

I woke up. Surrounded by Darkness again. I frowned. A little disappointed. I had hoped that the fact of me being surrounded by rocks chopped into bits and was slightly amnesic was a fucking bad dream… A fool's hope I suppose. I sighed. Then I felt a sharp pain. I wondered where my chest and lungs were… It really did hurt to breath deeply sometimes……and my torso… and my…..   
I blushed.   
I……… I didn't want to think about that….   
Well… since I already was thinking about it…. I suppose… From what I feel….It's not being crushed by anything…nothing life threatening anyway…compared with the chest and the lungs and the legs and the arms…. It's actually small…. Compared with other parts of the body….So maybe it slipped through a crack somewhere…. that's all I can make of my… well… 'important' parts…   
….  
Okay, shut the fuck up! Don't think about stuff like that! Geez… what's wrong with me…..   
Well, I guess I'm bored. Not much to do as a severed head surrounded by crushing blackness with no one to talk to… Not even old experiences to recount upon…. I could try to remember them…. But how could I do that? I can't even remember my own name…. Well, I know I like to fucking curse, and I'm a badass fucking immortal…. That's something….. I sighed. I closed my eyes again. Sleep had already become a habit here…. I tire of energy so quickly in this hellhole….  
My eyes shot open.  
Hellhole? Hole? Hole….. I was in a hole! I remembered something… I was in a hole! I was…. Yes… In a hole underground….. I…. I was blown up…… by a paper bomb…… and I fell into this hole….. and rocks buried me…. I was still a little shaky on the details…. I knew there was more too it then that… that it was manipulative and planned out….. or some shit similar….. Something…. That involved a fight…. I winced… my head hurt. I was trying to remember too much in one shot… I was going to sigh, but then I remembered that hurt… So I decided not too…. I smirked instead. Well, at least I was remembering some things…. I closed my eyes. I'll try my best to remember more each day…. For now, that was my goal.  
…………………………  
…  
I woke up again. Still surrounded by darkness. I don't know how long I've been in here. I knew I woke up two days ago, but how long was I in there before then? And….. were those even days? I lost track of all time in here. I closed my eyes. Not tired. Just thinking. The silence helped me. It was nearly like meditation…. Medi-? Meditation? Did I…. used to do that? I think I did…. For whom? My god….. Who was my god?   
….  
That question didn't accomplish an answer from my shattered brain.   
Nothing came to mind.  
That memory was lost.  
Then, for reasons unknown to me…. I felt tears sting my eyes. Why…. Was I crying? I never cried…. Never once in my fucking immortal life… Why was I so sad….? DAMN IT ALL!  
……   
Deep down, I think I knew why… No. Not deep down… I know why. I knew… I had once mediated for my god…. And…. To have done something spiritual like that…. I must have been truly and undoubtedly devoted to him….. or her….. I can't remember…… I cried…..because I knew that this was an important part of what my life once was…. And…. I couldn't even remember my own god. I'm sure… him…. Or her…. Is disappointed in me…. I still, had some feelings… in my heart, for what I felt for my god, but the memory, the reconciliation…. Wasn't there. I didn't know my god. All I knew, is that I had one. And he..or she… IT was very important to me… and I was crying because to me…. It felt as if I was forgetting a long life friend. But… If my god had been SO important to me… why did it let this happen? Why was I here? Why couldn't I remember it's name, or anything about it…. Besides that I used to love it…. I opened my eyes, tears dripping down my cheeks. I croaked out in the hole, my voice harsh and withered and weak, "M-my god…. I don't remember you…………. Do you remember me…..?"  
No response. I cried even more. What was the point? To me…. My god didn't exist anymore, at least…Not in the strong sense that I think I felt for it once…. God has left me. Left me alone… To die…. Then, I smiled. I felt strangely happy. I don't regret not remembering my god. If my god was cruel like this…. I don't think I would want to follow it again. God has left me. And for the first time…. Knowing that my god has left me…. I felt happy. I couldn't explain why… It was weird… I was betrayed by my god, whom I couldn't remember……..so in turn…. I betrayed it…..But I was content… I smiled slightly, and closed my eyes contemplating the feeling of why I was happy…  
Then… As I drifted off to sleep, it hit me….  
Freedom.  
I was finally free.

………………..  
…………….  
………………..  
……………….

I woke up again. Still in darkness. But for some reason, I was surrounded by cheerful optimism that is hard to find when your body is slowly rotting away. Let's see what else I can remember today…. I already know… I got blown up, crushed down in a hole, and had a god. A fucking worthless god. I smiled. It was nice to hear those words in my head. I had a feeling the 'old me' would be cursing myself for such blasphemy, but…. I didn't fucking care! I loved hearing those words in my head… god had left me. There was no god. And if my god did exist… he/she/it can rot in a hole… well… not this hole… a different hole.. I don't want it near me after what it did to me…. Well….. enough badmouthing my so-called 'god'…. I better start from the basics…. More specific… how did I get here? I know I got blown up by paper bombs…. There was a lot….. I tried to remember how many, but that was impossible… well, I know now I'm not good at fucking math…. Then… something else… the bombs… and the pit…. It was a trap…. I was fooled here….. led here….. I closed my eyes, struggling to remember…. I still felt that rock on my head…. That was probably the cause of my slight amnesia…… Then I opened my eyes… I remembered…..something…. but this was foggy, almost as if it was a dream…. Or a memory from when I was two…..   
"Your bullshit doesn't scare me…  
You see….You and I…. we believe in very different things…  
I believe in the will of fire.  
And that so-called-god…____ isn't your god anymore…. I am.  
The only one passing judgment is me."  
I could barely remember those words…. I still couldn't remember my god..… I even struggled to remember who spoke those words..….. I then realized I didn't know his name…. but I could remember his face…. Fucking ugly kid, with a damn pineapple ponytail… It burned my insides up thinking about him… but…. I couldn't remember….. what I yelled at him before I was buried. Something about…. Passing judgment…. Biting him to death… some bullshit like that… That seemed so meaningless now. I didn't even know what I did to the kid to make him so angry as to blow me up…. It must have been something truly horrible…. But then again….. I didn't feel like I was a horrible person. Everything I did back then…. It was for my god. My god was the horrible person… or thing… what ever the fuck it was…. I didn't believe that brat was my god neither. He had said that to make me frustrated, and inferior, and I think it had worked…. But….. what did I do to that kid to make him do this to me? ….. I then vaguely remembered I used to kill for my god…. Had I killed someone important to him? That must have been it… Well fuck you, retard! I didn't KNOW! I've killed many, I remembered…. Many… thousands… for my god… then…. I frowned… so many lives lost over something that didn't exist. If I ever got out of here… I could maybe apologize, to everyone I hurt…. but I don't think that would cut it. It would be best for me to avoid them…. Never see those people again. I knew, that I had been so fixed on revenge…… I had a feeling, because of the acid rising in my gut whenever I thought of that ponytailed kid, but….. I figured…. Living with the pain of losing a loved one is pretty good enough revenge for me… I don't want to kill anymore. At least….. Not for my god. Killing that bastard only out of vengeance for what he did to my god would kill me. I didn't believe in god. I don't want to kill for him/her/it. When I get out of here….. If I ever do….. I will still slaughter…. Oh yes…. I remember I loved to do that……. I will still slaughter… but not in the name of my old god…. No… In the name of myself. Kill what I want, when I want, how I want…. With my scythe…

Scythe…?

SCYTHE!!!   
I remembered my weapon! How could I forget that? I remembered the pure ecstasy I got during a slaughter, waving that thing around… stretching out the cord, mid-range, and close combat plus taijustu were my specialty… I grinned in the dark… oh god, how I wish I had my body and my scythe… I would have loved to feel that thing in my hands….   
I grinned excited. I was remembering so much in just one day… I waited for more memories to show themselves as my thoughts continued to wander…. But nothing else did… Well, I shouldn't expect to much…. My memories are shattered…. I closed my eyes…. Sleeping had definitely become a habit now…. Remember something, then go to bed… Well, my goal was simple. Just try to regain my memories while trapped here…. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll recount everything before I die…  
……  
Oh wait…  
I can't….

……………………………………………………  
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…………………….  
I woke up again. Still surrounded by darkness. I wonder how long my naps were? Did they last a few minutes….. or a few hours… or days perhaps years? That last one seemed lengthily… Longer then my other rests… Was I dying? Then, I reminded myself I couldn't die….  
….  
Then Something hit me. My immortality came from my god. How could I have forgotten that? Well, I guess that meant that I was slowly dying since I declared blasphemy on him. Or her… IT! What the fuckever! I don't even remember…. Well, even if I was dying because I no longer believed in that god… I didn't care. I was still free. I still felt free.   
….  
I might as well try to remember my own name…. since nothing else really comes to mind…..   
……..  
….  
….  
….  
Shit..  
I don't even know my own name…. I feel pathetic.. I don't even know who I am. I sighed…. I am me. I decided.  
Yes…  
…….  
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…………  
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…………..  
………….  
I woke up. Had I fallen asleep? My naps are becoming more unpredictable now… as when I awaken as well. I could tell by the way I felt, I was unconscious for maybe a week. I'm becoming more unconscious these days then unconscious… I knew I was going to die soon…. But not for awhile. Perhaps a year at best… If I hold on long enough. I want to hold on. A hole, is a miserable existence…. But….. at least I was free… free from my god….  
………….  
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I woke up. I knew that was a real long nap. Days? Months? Rocks around me. Still alive. I was still here…. Why….. why hadn't anyone come to get me…. Did anyone like me? My god…. Disowned me, that fucker blew me up… and now…. No one got me…. I knew…. Feeling like this was pathetic… but can you blame me? I don't even know how long I was trapped in this…. In this… this….  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
Suddenly, all my feelings of hatred, mistrust, sadness, despair, pain, and hopelessness came out in just one exclamation… I screamed. I yelled. I cried. I cursed. I cursed the fucking sky, the fucking ground, my fucking god, my fucking head, I cursed myself. I cursed the plants… I cursed my life. I cursed everything imaginable, I screamed, I cried. Everything I held back, was being pushed forward through my hoarse throat. I wasn't dying… Too early. Then.. when I had near exhausted my voice… I found myself crying…. Full blown crying. Sobbing….. Not even caring. I didn't care. I let the tears come. They streamed down my face… I blubbered and sobbed… I whimpered…. I cried and cried. I cried because I couldn't remember most of anything else, I cried because I was in a hole, I cried because my god had forsaken me, but most of all, I cried because….. no one came to get me. After all this time. Where was everyone? I lost all my memory of past relationships… but I'm sure I had friends…. Or…. Co-workers…. Associates… acquaintances… of some sort… why didn't they come and get me… after all this time? My god left me for dead. That pineapple ponytail brat left me for dead… my friends left me for dead.  
Did no one like me? Was I just a huge nuisance to them? Was I that horrible of a person…. I sobbed…. I knew I hated self-pity, but…….. I cried even more. I couldn't stop myself. I cried and cried… everything seemed so hopeless…. My life was hopeless….. I wanted to die…. If my god hated me…. Why didn't it just fucking kill me now? I sobbed….. "KILL ME!!!! KILL ME YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!! YOU HATE ME, EH?!?! I FAILED YOU! I DON'T REMEMBER YOU! I THINK YOUR SHIT NOW! I DON'T EVEN LOVE YOU ANYMORE!!! WHY DON'T YOU KILL ME?!?! YOU HATE ME, RIGHT?! RIGHT?!?! Kill me….." I cried. "just kill me….." my angry shouts became soft whimpers..… "just kill me…d-d-damn it……"

………………………………

I lost track of time… Days came and went. I woke. I slept. I woke. I slept. Each day was a living hell, each time I went to sleep, I hoped that I would be dead… every time I woke… I felt like crying… And I think I did. When did I become such a pussy….? I didn't really care. All sense of pride was lost for me. I was lower then shit. I was a starving, dying, animal, wanting to be put down. Nothing was good in this life for me. It tortured me to live. Every day. Was this my god's punishment? Other then death?.... earlier…. I had felt death coming to me…. Now….. I no longer feel it. I think my god, gave me my immortality back. Just to torture me in this hellhole… Every day… I wanted to die. Sometimes, I just breathed deeply in hopes that I would puncture my lung on one of the jagged rocks… One day… I succeeded, but all that accomplished was me screaming my head off, and bitching about it. I still lived. And the pain still hurts… My sense of pride and arrogance is lost. Every night I cried myself to sleep, only to wake up, crying again because I still lived. I hated my life.  
Someone…  
Anyone…  
Just kill me.  
……………….  
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…………………  
I woke up… I WOKE up?… I cried….. My eyes felt damp and red from crying so much lately, but I didn't care…. I hated living. If begging got me to die, hell, I'd beg like a bitch. I opened my eyes…. Taking in my surroundings… rock. Rock. Rock. And dark. Dark on top of rock in a fucking hellhole. I truly hated my existence. My existence, was like an suffering very old dog whose selfish owner refused to put it down. I wanted to be put down. My life was shit. I was shit. No, lower then shit. At least people looked out for shit in case they accidently step in it… Me? Ha! No one looked out for me… otherwise I wouldn't be here….. something caught my eye in the complete darkness, something that wasn't there before. Something white and fluttering in the corner of one of the rocks… I nearly screamed. It surprised me. It wasn't normal for me. Seeing something, other then rocks, other then myself…. Scared me…. I was surprised at how really pussy I was. How long was I in here again? The white thing moved…. I twitched. It scared me. It really fucking terrified me. I wasn't used to it. I kept my eyes on it. As my eyes focused on this new strange thing in my space… I realized it was a white butterfly…. Yet it still scared me. I don't even know how it got down here….. I stared at it, following it's movements…. It looked like it was looking for something…. I was scared. I kept my eyes on it. Never leaving it… then….. the butterfly fluttered a little above my head. My eyes widened in shock and fear. I felt so pussy. A little butterfly was scaring me shitless? And yet…. It was….. this wasn't it's place…. I had been alone to long…. Movement freighted me….. It fluttered above my head…. Then it went away…. Then….. I felt lonely all of a sudden…. I was crazy. I didn't even know how to describe my own feelings anymore… I was crazy. The hellhole did that to me. There was no other way to describe it. I then found tears sting my eyes again….. wishing again I was dead….  
I truly am…  
Fucking insane…  
……………..  
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……

I woke up. I was blind! I was blind! What? What? Everything was so bright….. this was strange…. It wasn't common place…… Common place was me waking up in darkness, crying, begging for me to be killed. My eyes darted around frantically in the blinding white light. I couldn't see anything… Then I heard something… someone… someone speaking… I was too panicked to even hear their words… my eyes kept darting everywhere…. I looked like a timid deer the way I was acting… and then.. that metaphor in my head, made me only grow with fear….. deer……. I don't know why…. But the thought of them terrifies me…. I was shaking… my eyes darting everywhere… whimpering, scared….. I didn't care…. My pride, and arrogance had been abandoned long ago…. I nearly felt like crying again… I was so scared… Then I heard the voice again… in a soothing tone, I was still too upset to hear what they were saying….. then…. I felt a gentle hand go through my tangled hair…. My breathing quickened… I stared straight ahead, but I still couldn't see, all I could see was brightness. I was still blinded. I stared, my eyes wide…. Breathing labored….. terrified.. I was scared. The gentle hand continued to stroke through my hair… I calmed down a little, just enough to make out the words…  
"ssssshhhhhhhhh, shhhhhhhhhhhhh, it's okay, Hidan…. It's okay…… shhhhhh…. You're alright….. your fine….. I'm not going to hurt you………shhhhhh…. Easy……"  
My breathing slowed down a little. It was a woman. That would explain the gentle hands…. She had a deep strong gentle voice… if any of that made any sense….. she continued to stroke her fingers though my hair… My eyes continued to remain wide…. I was scared. I was scared…. Her words offered comfort… but…. Very little. I was still terrified….. My eyes slowly began adjusting to the light…. It must of taken me a good full hour. I wasn't used to light… I had nearly become an owl in that hole…. Then…. I saw I was surrounded by trees, and a woman held my head in her hands… I stared at her. She had blue hair, with a white flower tying a hair in her bun, yellow-brown catlike eyes, a piercing stud under her lip. She was wearing a black cloak with red clouds on it. I stared at her…. I trembled.  
She seemed to realize my eyes finally adjusted to the light. She smiled slightly.  
"Hello, Hidan-san…. Welcome back…"  
All I could do was stare.  
Her smile then vanished when she saw I didn't respond.  
"How you feeling?"  
I couldn't answer. I continued to stare. I was still scared.  
She stared back. Then she said…  
"Of coarse…. Let me patch you up, and then we'll talk."  
She set my head down near a tree. Then I gasped and nearly screamed when she turned her arm into paper, and folded them into butterflies. then, she turned her head to me, and assured me that it was okay… I didn't get her exact words…. I was too scared… The way…. Best to describe me now…. Is kinda like a beaten neglected puppy being in the dark for too long…. I knew that…. If I was in the light… this was my form of rescue… but I was still scared… what did she want me for? What did she save me for? What did she want me to do? Why was she being nice to me? These questions pounded in my brain….I then realized she was searching for my body. With her butterflies… they found a part of me, and she started digging at those places… So that's what that butterfly was yesterday… it was searching me out….   
She turned back, she found all of my pieces, and smiled, but frowned when she noticed my eyes were red. But she shook her head, and made nothing off it. She set my bodyparts near me… I stared at them, in a little relief… thankfully, my whole torso had been undamaged, except for a gaping hole ripping it open. It must have been hit with a sharp rock. That's why it hurt to breathe…. Then…. She pulled a needle from her cloak. I gasped and my eyes widened fearfully.  
"I won't hurt you." She said gently. I stared at her. I was scared. But….. she sounded as if she wouldn't….. Then…. I felt the needle sewing me in and out… she was starting with my neck. It hurt…. But… I didn't make a sound…. I lay. Defeated. I let her work on me.  
"I'm not as good with this as Kakuzu was, so you'll have to forgive me." She said indifferently.   
I said nothing. I continued to stare upwards as she continued to work on me. I didn't make any noise of pain. No noise. I didn't even say anything or exclaim anything when she began sewing my member back on. Nothing touched me. I felt broken. It took a couple of hours… but I was back together… I tried moving my hand…. But I couldn't… my eyes looked downward… I then saw that my whole body was grey…. Almost corpse like…. No blood in my entire body…. I couldn't even move… She slowly gabbed the back of my head and body…. My eyes widened. She propped me up against the tree, so I could look at her, and she covered me with her cloak. I was a little grateful.  
Scared, and broken…..I was… but I was grateful she covered me…. I still felt a little uncomfortable being naked in the presence of a woman…. She stared at me. I didn't look at her. I looked at the ground…. I didn't want to face my savoir.  
"So….." she finally said.  
"Eleven years."  
I blinked. I then looked at her. That long? I was trapped for eleven years? No wonder I had become such a pussy. I had been in the dark and isolated with half a mind for eleven years….. That was enough to break anyone's mind… make anyone insane…..  
"It must have been hell in there…." She said gently.  
I didn't say anything. It was. It truly was.  
She stared at me for about a full minute.  
"Well, aren't you going to whine about it?" she asked. "A rude comment perhaps?"  
I said nothing. All my pride and arrogance I had….. was gone…… I had nothing to bitch about. It did no good.  
She stared at me for another full minute.  
"Want to talk about it?"  
My eyes widened… I stared at her as if she had just asked me to jump off a building… Then… suddenly, unexpectedly, I began to cry… Tears streamed down my face. I could hear her gasp. I didn't care anymore… I didn't fucking care if she saw me cry. Who I was before….. I barely remember him anyway….. my pride is gone….. I'm lower then shit…. What makes a difference if she sees me cry….? Tears streamed down my face… I didn't want to talk….. I didn't want to talk…. Don't make me fucking talk….. don't make me…  
I felt her hands around my cold body, she held me in a hug…   
I couldn't push her away… My body was still recovering…. There was no blood running through my body and I couldn't even remember how to move my joints anyway……. I was limp in her hands…. I cried even more… I was so weak.. so pussy, there was nothing I could do about it…. Don't make me talk….. please…. Just don't make me talk…… I don't want to talk…. I don't want to speak…. Hot tears blinded me…. I cried… I felt her hand stroke though my hair….as she held my limp body…. I accepted the form of human contact…. I needed human contact…. It only took me till now how much I missed people….. interacting with people….. I cried….. I cried more…. I couldn't stop…. I continued to cry…. She continued to stroke her hand through my tangled mass of hair…   
"Shhhh… shh….. Hidan….Hidan….Hidan…" she kept saying that over and over with such love and such comfort… It was then I realized Hidan was my name…. she was calling me. Comforting me… She saved me. She came for me when no one else did…. When everyone else in the world had abandoned me. I cried harder. One person. One person out of many came for me, but at least I knew someone cared… I cried and my head slumped onto her bare shoulder…. And I cried into her shoulder. I was saved. She saved me. She saved me. She stroked her hand through my hair comfortingly. I couldn't stop crying.   
"Oh Hidan…." She sighed. "What has being in that awful place done to you?"   
I sniffed. I closed my eyes, but the tears didn't stop coming… She continued stroking my hair gently. My savoir. I didn't believe in god anymore. God had left me. But……. Could there be such a thing………  
As angels?


	2. Recovery from Insanity

I let him cry on my shoulder. He didn't seem to be letting up any time soon. I felt so bad for him. There was nothing I could do, but stroke his silver tangled hair, and assure him everything was okay. I could tell eleven years of being trapped in there had really taken his toll on the loudmouth that always spoke out against Pein's plans during the meetings. I saw no arrogance in those violet eyes of his. The look in his eyes when he looked at me…... he seemed like a lost child. Eleven years was a long time. I had left Akatsuki long ago. And all members besides me were dead. It was just luck… One day I remembered that we had an immortal member. Buried alive in the Narra Clan forest… and I wondered if he was still alive…. Well, I guess I was right. I used my butterflies to search out the area… only Narra clan members could enter, and my paper jutsu was undetectable to the deer. It wasn't human. One of the few advantages of being able to become paper. I had found his head the day before, and saw him, staring at me with wide fearful eyes. He was alive. We had left him there all those years. As the Akatsuki members fell, he was trapped there the whole time. As the years went by, the Akatsuki fell, I lived, and Hidan stayed buried all those years, slowly losing his mind. I felt guilt. Pein never bothered to look for Hidan when we got the news he had been buried. We all assumed he was dead. Kakuzu? We didn't bother to get his body back. He was a corpse. Similar situations with Deidara and Itachi. Pein never checked his associates to see if they were actually still alive. Maybe if he had done so back then, the Akatsuki would of triumphed… instead of having just one lone member who hides in the shadows. Maybe if he had done so…. And got some of his members back…… Nagato would of still been alive…along with the others…. but…. I don't want to think about that.

 

Hidan sobbed harder. He weakly moved his head a little closer to my neck. I felt his tears and snot on my shoulder. I petted his bare back gently. He was definitely different from how I vaguely remember him. Always loud, swearing, complaining, yelling at Pein and Kakuzu all the time… Now…. He seemed quiet, scared, freighted… He was a little lost child that ran away from home….. now coming back and saying he was sorry he had misbehaved before.

"Hidan…" I started.

He made no sound. He just continued to cry.   
"Hidan…" I said again.  
Again. He didn't respond. I then grabbed his shoulders and held him so he had to look at me in the eye. My cloak fell off his shoulders a little. His violet eyes were wet with tears… He looked away… ashamed…. 

"Hidan…" I said. "What happened, are you alright?"

His eyes slowly forced their way up to look at me. He was like a timid little animal. He stared at me dumbly. A blank, fearful, unblinking stare. No recognition showed on his eyes. Did he not remember me? Well, I believe we only meet once in person. There must have been at least a full five minutes of silence between us. I examined his face. His whole left eye was swollen, and a few bruises throughout his body. The stitches traveled around most of his body everywhere from where I patched him up. His skin was grey pale, nearly corpse like.. I knew that Hidan was far from alright. From the way he was moving, I could tell that his brain's muscle memory had been lost. His hair… once I vaguely remember was slicked back, had grown out, even in that hole, but it had grown out in a tangled way.. frayed here and there… He smelled of death. And he looked even worse. His eyes were red, and I could tell this wasn't the first time he had cried while down there. His eyes were fearful and apprehensive as opposed to the violent arrogance I used to see in his hologram form…. He looked so scared of everything….. Hidan stared at me a long time, before finally, weakly, looking down, trying to use hair to hide his face. I hesitated… I then moved some silver stands away from his face, gently. 

His eyes snapped up and looked at me. Wide and fearful, and he looked like he was going to cry again. 

"Your not going to talk to me?" I asked gently as if I was speaking to a child. Hidan stared at me. He said nothing, but had a pleading, begging look on his face. He didn't want to talk. Was he that emotionally hurt? I got my answer when I noticed that his lower lip trembled slightly, as one did before bursting into tears. I then held him again.

"It's okay." I said softly. "Don't cry….You don't need to talk….I won't make you…" I then, heard something of what sounded like a sigh of relief, and I felt a few last tears on my shoulder. I rubbed his back slightly. He was so cold… almost like a corpse. He stayed on my shoulder for a long time…. Then I realized, if we stayed like this, we would be discovered by the Narra clan's deer in no time, and no doubt, they will inform Konaha ninja. I did not want them eliminating the last of Akatsuki again. 

"Hidan…" I began. But I got the typical silent response. I sighed and gently pushed him off of my shoulders, then I saw his eyes were closed, and he was breathing deeply. He was asleep. I stared at him concerned. His eyes were still wet with tears, his hair was a mess, and he looked so pale and dirty. He was covered in dirt and dried blood. I felt pity for him. Why hadn't Pein sent us to rescue him when we first learned he was immobilized? Why did we leave him for dead? I couldn't help feeling guilty. When I had abandoned Akatsuki, I abandoned him as well….. I shook my head, that didn't help the situation now. I then lifted him a little, and slipped my cloak around his naked form. He didn't stir. I slowly and gently lifted him into my hands. I looked as his expression as he slept. He had a look of defeat on his face, as his eyes still remained wet with tears. He was broken. I brushed a loose strand of hair away from his eyes. I then began running, carrying him bridal style. He was heavy. Once we were out of the forest, then I could use my wings to make a quick getaway. I did not want to inform the Kohana ninja I had just dug up an Akatsuki member. They might get the wrong idea. I was only doing this out of concern, and perhaps…. Nostalgia… 

As soon as we were in the clearing, and out of the woods, I unfolded my paper wings. I held Hidan firmly, so he wouldn't fall, and we both flew up into the sky. I couldn't stop staring at him. Even when I was airborne. His expression was so sad and brokenhearted, even while sleeping.   
…  
It was a long trip, and Hidan didn't even wake up once. I was surprised at how exhausted he was, but I reminded myself, that his body is probably just recovering. He's spent eleven years without a body… he probably wasn't accustomed to it as well as he used to be. By the time we arrived in Amegakure, it was nighttime. I flew silently and landed on top of a very tall building. My paper retracted and became my skin again. I could enter through the roof. I didn't want to go to the front entrance, holding Hidan, who looked like a corpse in my arms. I walked towards the door and opened it, we went down a couple flights of stairs, and then entered into a large room. In fact, the very same room where Pein, Madara, and I had meet after Deidara's death. This building of the city was still where the village leader stayed, and ruled Amegakure. That was me. I had taken over after Nagato had scarified himself for peace. Although, I had never mentioned to the townsfolk that their God was dead, for the sake of political purposes. Since no villager has laid eyes on him before everything worked out fine.

I had done things to the dark and dreary room since then, to make it feel more like a home for myself. No one else was in here. Good. It worked better that way. I sat Hidan down on the couch. He didn't stir. He continued to slumber. I stared at him. I felt so bad. Complete and utter isolation for eleven years. I should of rescued him sooner. His body was so cold. He still looked like a corpse. I hesitated, then I slipped my cloak off his shoulders. I then began rubbing his bare chest to get the blood flowing a little. He continued to sleep soundlessly, the same look of despair on his face. I continued to rub his chest, his whole body was like ice. 

…  
Poor Hidan.

 

I don't know how long I was at it, but I awoke the next morning to a freighted whimper. I blinked my eyes open. Sun was shining through the window, and I determined it was morning. I had fallen asleep on his chest. Hidan stared at me, his violet orbs wide with panic, as he looked around the room. I understood. 

"It's okay." I said. "I brought you here. I live here." Hidan then stared at me. It seemed to put him at ease. He took a deep breath. And stared at the ceiling. He had calmed down a little from when I first got him out of that hole but he still seemed in a bad state of mind. I realized it wasn't me he was scared off. If he's at ease with me saying such a thing… He seems to trust me, but seems freighted of anything that is new to him. I examined his face and body. There was a little color was returning but not much. I placed my hands on his chest. Then his eyes turned really wide. As if he was afraid I would hurt him.   
"It's alright…" I explained. "I'm just trying to get the blood flowing through your body." I said as I began rubbing his chest again. As I did, I noticed that his breathing quickened and became slightly irregular. I ignored it, and continued rubbing his chest. I didn't stop until that was then I noticed he was trembling. I stopped, and looked at his face. He looked away, embarrassed, as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't have. 

"Hidan? What is it?" I asked.

He didn't look at me. Then, I began rubbing his chest again. As I did so, I realized he was holding his breath. I raised an eyebrow. Then, as my hands moved off his chest, my fingers grazed his ribs.  
"PTThaheehe…" Hidan laughed a little bit. Then he stared at me, slightly horrified. I blinked.   
"Your ticklish?" I asked him, trying not to laugh. Hidan. S-ranked criminal. Jashinist worshiper. Crazied killer. Sailor Mouth…. Was ticklish?   
Hidan glared a little at me, failing to see what was funny about it. I smirked, and began actually tickling his ribs.   
"AAAAAH!!!! hahahahahahahahhHHAaaaa!!" He laughed and his body started convulsing as his brain struggled to remember how to move his limbs to defend himself. I then eased back a little bit. Because it wasn't entirely fair to me seeing him like that. Seemed unfair. Hidan panted for breath and let out a few sighed laughs. I smiled and giggled. Hidan looked at me. He didn't seem to like it. He had a look of distain on his face, and a little apprehensive shyness. His eyes shifted slightly. 

"I won't do that again." I said. "I promise." I placed my hands on his chest again, and he tensed up. I began rubbing to get the blood flowing again, careful to avoid his ribs. I herd a small chuckle emerge from his throat. I smiled slightly. "Never pictured you the ticklish type." Hidan's eyes shifted, and he looked away from me. He was embarrassed. I examined his body. The color was slowly coming back, but it was so faint. He still looked like a living corpse. I knew it would take me hours for the blood to properly flow in his system. I stood up. Hidan's eyes widened in shock. I then turned around, but stopped when I realized he was touching me. I looked back. Hidan's eyes looked pleading and fearful. He stared hopelessly at me. I stared shocked. His arm was raised. He willed himself to move his arm. From the way it was positioned, it looked like he tried to grab me, but because of the weak blood flow, and lack of muscle memory, the best he could do was touch part of my clothing with his outstretched fingers. He blinked at me, a horrified expression on his face. It took me awhile to realize what he was scared off. 

"Oh! No, Hidan…" I took his hand, and knelt by him. "I'm not going to leave you, I'm just thinking giving you a bath would be better then me rubbing your chest for hours.."  
Hidan still looked horrified. He didn't want to be left alone. Even for a few seconds. Of course. Complete isolation for eleven years, he was sure to have abandonment issues.  
"Hidan. It's alright." I said. Rather as a form of comfort, I said it as a statement of fact. Hidan stared at me with fascination and curiosity. He blinked. Then his hand fell to his side. He stared at me with narrowed eyes. I blinked. I didn't understand. He didn't appear angry. Hidan continued to look at me, unblinking. He was staring at me as if I was a complex math problem or something.

"I'll be back." I said.  
Hidan stared.  
He then gave a slight weak nod of his head. Showing it was okay. I left for the bathroom, and began filling the tub with hot water. I made sure it was warm as possible without burning him. We really needed to get his blood flow back to his body. When I found it was the right temperature, I went back to Hidan. I found him staring at the ceiling, as if in a trance. He was thinking about something.

"Hidan" I said.  
He weakly turned his head.   
"Can you walk?" I asked him. A stupid question.  
Hidan stared at me. I stared back. There was a long silence. Hidan then shook his head. Of course he couldn't. I then grabbed his arm, and hoisted his weight onto my shoulders. I gasped as his whole weight came down on me. I nearly fell over. I blinked a few times, and stared at him. I didn't just expect him to fall back. Hidan stared at me, despite his pale face, I noticed a light blush on his cheeks. His purple orbs for eyes shifted nervously. He looked away from me.

"Tch." He replied angrily.   
I couldn't help but give myself a small smile. "I thought you didn't want to talk." I said.  
Hidan glared at me. He was very embarrassed of himself. He had forgotten how to walk. I can't necessarily blame him though. I think I would too if I was in his same situation.  
"It's alright.." I said, as I dragged his deadweight into the bathroom. I caught him out of the corner of my eye as I carried him. Hidan was staring at me intently. It was an very intense curious stare. There was no way I could really describe the way he was looking at me. His eyes shone bright at me with the innocence and curiosity of a two year old. I wondered what he kept staring at. He seemed to be searching me. What was he looking for? What was he thinking about? I don't even think he noticed when we were in the bathroom until I told him.

"Hidan…" 

\-------------------------------------------

That angel… my savoir…. I found…. Was truly amazing. She had a certain way of doing things. Her voice held a certain enchantment for me….. Everything that she said seemed to come out in a way that was as matter a fact and to the point as possible. She didn't seem to speak much, except only when absolutely necessary. She seemed to be appreciative of silence…. While I kinda liked that…. It tortured me. I had been so long without human contact, I really would love to hear her voice in my ears…. Since I don't want to talk myself….. I just wanted to hear her. And even though I was basically butt-ass-naked in front of her except for her cloak, she never seemed to be embarrassed of me. Somehow, it made me feel strangely comfortable in her presence… The expression she held when she did everything for me… It seemed like stone. Like rock. She held almost no expression, even when she laughed, even though the laugh was purely genuine. Everything she did, was full of so much compassion for me, but, she held no expression. She even held none when I realized I couldn't even remember how to fucking walk. Just that cold stare. I couldn't really tell what she thought of me… She really fucking confused me, and scared me at the same time…. Why did she want me…? What was I here for? While I trusted my savoir…. Well….. I wanted to trust my savoir….I didn't know her…. I couldn't remember ever meeting a woman like this and if I had, I'd think I'd remember….

"Hidan."

My name. I still had trouble getting used to hearing it. I blinked. I noticed her auburn eyes staring at me intensely, then motioned downwards. My gaze followed hers. We were both standing in front of a tub of steaming hot water. We were at the bathroom already? I hadn't realized… Come to think of it, I hadn't realized I had been staring at her. I struggled to move my head back to her. I succeeded. I stared at her, a bit nervously. While I knew what was coming next, I still felt slightly embarrassed. My angel stared back at me. That same expressionless look on her face. She seemed unfazed by it. She didn't even blink. I looked away from her piercing eyes. She was slightly intimidating. I wondered…. How could I still be a little embarrassed over something as stupid as this? I had been trapped in that hole for eleven years… completely broken…. How could I still have a little pride after all of that….? I still can't believe she would rescue me of all people…. My savoir rubbed my shoulder slightly. I blinked and weakly looked up at her. She had that same emotionless expression on her face. For some reason or another, she made me feel safe. She never seemed embarrassed around my naked form, so why should this time be any different? I nodded my head, weakly, telling her I was ready… then I noticed some strands of hair fell into my eyes. I wasn't used to that. It must of grown out in that hellhole. She understood slipped her cloak off of me. I watched her intently, timidly. She didn't even have the desire to look down at my lower regions. She just seemed to handle the business of undressing me, as if it was the simple task of…. Checking the fucking mail or something. She always had this certain grace about her. Everything was matter-of-fact. No movement was wasted. Because of that… I didn't feel threatened by her… I know my angel would never hurt me. I trusted her. She saved me when everyone else had forgotten about me. She-

"YYYAAAAAHHH!!!!" I yelped as I suddenly felt my toes touching scalding hot water. I blinked. I didn't even realize she had begun hoisting me into the tub. 

"Sorry Hidan, but we need to get your blood flowing as soon as possible, so it might be a little hot.." 

She said as she lowered me down slowly. I yelped again as my ass then touched the steaming hot water. I cringed, as she lowered my whole body into the burning water. She then let go of me and let me there. I cringed and panted a couple of times.. Fuck… she wasn't kidding about this shit being HOT! I cringed one last time, as I began to get used to it a little. I felt the hot water flow around my cold corpse-like body. I sighed. It wasn't half bad.. It actually felt kind of nice… I closed my eyes. Then I was able to remember how great showers were….. been so long…… eleven years…. I had nearly forgotten about all that personal hygiene shit I took so much pride in, I'm sure…… I haven't cleaned myself in eleven years…. I must of stank something fierce too. I slunk a little lower in the tub, my eyes still closed. It felt really nice. Despite the fact that the water was scalding hot, I liked it. I couldn't explain why, but it felt great. I felt myself almost dozing off. Sleep had become so habit for me in that fucking hole, that it was hard for me to break. And the water……..was really relaxing……………I felt myself drifting off in the tub. 

"Not that bad is it?" she asked smugly.

I blinked opened my eyes and stared at her tiredly. It did feel great. I had nearly forgotten how this felt like. It just seemed so calming. I begun to close my eyes again, then I felt something on my chest. I opened my eyes. I noticed she was going over me with a sponge. I giggled slightly. It tickled. My angel looked back at me. 

"Sorry…" she apologized, knowing I was a little fucking…. ticklish… "But you have eleven years of dirt and dried blood all over you. Plus that wound on your chest." She explained. Wound? I looked down. The gaping hole on my chest was already beginning to heal at an alarming rate, but there was still blood everywhere. 

I nodded sleepily closing my eyes as I drifted off again. I felt her scrub most of every inch of my body. She was very gentle, but firm. She was extremely careful to avoid my new stitches. This hot water and the way she washed me was quite soothing. I snored softly. I was only half asleep. I think I was about to fully fall asleep, until I felt a hot washcloth in my face. My eyes shot open and I gave a muffled cry of surprise. She was washing my face.   
"You got a lot of dried blood on your face from when you got blown up…" She said. "It almost looks like a beard." 

I blinked a couple of times as she wiped my chin and mouth as if I was some toddler who got some ice cream on his face. Then she washed a little of my forehead. I twitched and yelped when she hit the bump right above my eye. It fucking hurt like a bitch when ya touched it.  
"Shh…. Easy Hidan.." she said gently as she massaged around that area as delicately as she could. I closed my eyes and whimpered slightly. It still hurt, but she was being gentle about it. Finally, she removed it from the sore area on my head. I sighed a little in relief. 

"Nasty bump there." I heard her say. I felt myself drifting off again slightly. I'm surprised how quickly I tire of energy. I then startled myself awake again when I felt a sponge in my…. Lower regions. My eyes shot at her at panic. She stared at me. Her face blank. What the hell was she doing?  
"Hidan, calm down…" she said soothingly. "It's just another part of your body that needs to be cleaned. Normally, I wouldn't use soap down there…. but every part of your body is filthy."  
I….. I know that……. but….. still……. I….  
"Your blushing." She said matter-a-factly.  
My eyes widened. Was I? I think I felt myself growing a bit redder at her comment.  
She lifted up the sponge and held it too me.   
"Look, if you could do this yourself, I would let you. Because sure as hell, I don't want to do it."  
I stared at the sponge. Then at her. I tried moving one of my hands to grab it. I managed to twitch my first finger, and one of my toes but that was it.  
My angel gave a small smile. "It looks like the bloodflow in your body is slowly recovering, but your muscle memory is still pretty shot. You best take it easy these few weeks okay?"  
Take it easy? What else could I do…. I didn't want to do anything. I had remembered I used to kill for my god, and their were requirements and limitations meant for that. But these were my own terms. I could do that when I wanted now, and I didn't feel like it. I smiled. It felt great thinking like that. It wasn't laziness. No. It was more like, exercising my new rights. I can kill. I like to kill, but I don't want to now. I snickered a little in my head at the thought: 'to kill, or not to kill… that is the question…'   
What was that from? I know I barely have no memory, so what was that? I knew it was something… I can't remember the name… Shakebeer? That's what I called him I remember but I doubt that was the guy's real name….. I barely remember it… and that memory of it didn't really recover well, so 'shakebeer' probably really meant nothing to me. Then why did I remember it?   
Did someone I kno-"OH! A-AH!"

All thought was stopped and I cringed slightly as I was aware of the sponge cleaning my lower regions. 

"Sorry." My angel replied when she saw my expression, and she continued a little more carefully and gently. The way she was going about it… There was nothing sexual about it. It was just a simple cleaning. But still, I was aware of it… every single movement she made down there….she was so gentle… and it was a little hard for me not to feel slightly aroused… I secretly thanked myself for my weak bloodflow… otherwise, I'm about 100% certain I would have a boner. Although, this cleaning of my privates only lasted about a minute or less…. It felt like forever in my mind…

She took the sponge away and my tired eyes traced her movements…   
"There, that wasn't so bad was it?" she said in her same cold voice.  
I just stared at her. Her auburn eyes, that ice-like expression. That cold voice. My angel…. Was truly……amazing… 

My state of slight arousal must of shown on my face because she slapped my cheek twice, as if she was scolding a child.   
"Easy there, Tiger, calm down. It was just a cleaning you baby, don't get your hopes up." She smirked at me.

I blinked. I became embarrassed that I got a little aroused from that. I lowered my head and slunk lower in the tub. So much so that it looked like I was trying to drown myself. I submerged my whole head in the steaming hot water.   
Hide me. I was better off in that hole….

My savoir pulled me out by my long mangy hair. I cringed in pain.   
"Hidan, it's alright. No big deal. No need to feel embarrassed, right?"   
But I was embarrassed. My eyes darted away nervously. I felt her hand stroke my face comfortingly.   
"It's alright." She said.  
I stared back at her. She looked at me gently with her auburn eyes.   
She…. My angel……. I blinked slowly as I felt her hand caress my cheek…. I closed my eyes to her touch……her hands were so soft and gentle…..  
….  
SNAP!  
Wha? Huh?  
"Hidan, were you falling asleep?"  
I stared at her. Was I asleep? I guess I was. I stared at her tiredly.  
"Hidan, don't fall asleep in the tub, okay?"  
I tiredly nodded. That would be hard to do. Considering I was very tired, and the hot water was fucking relaxing. I closed my eyes once more, but they shot open when I heard my angel got up and left me. My savoir! My angel! Don't leave me! Please don't leave me! My eyes darted around the room frantically, searching for her. Then I saw her come back to me, bottle of shampoo in hand. I sighed in relief. I hated being so pussy, but… after eleven years of being alone…. It really scares me to be left by myself.  
"Now we have to do your hair." She said it as a fact. Like the way she always did.  
I nodded tiredly….  
………..  
…….  
SNAP!!  
What? Who?  
"Hidan… Don't fall asleep." She said annoyed as she had some shampoo in her hands.  
I didn't even realize I had fallen asleep. Sleep had become so habit for me in that hole. I tire of energy so quickly.

I felt her hands go through my tangled mass of hair. I closed my eyes. Not because I was sleeping, but because it felt so good. Each knot she touched, the way she massaged my scalp, and the lather of soap that built up in my hair when she did it… it just felt like heaven. My head rolled to her touch, and she massaged gently. She was so gentle with me. I vaguely remembered, that gentleness was something I wasn't too found of in the past….. but now, it was something I needed. Something I wanted. I craved human kindness. Human contact… just being with this gentle creature was enough to make me happy. Not necessarily whole, but I knew I was recovering from the horrible state of mind that I was in when I was buried six feet under. I know I no longer wished I was dead. I was just scared of nearly everything new to me….which was practically everything considering I don't remember much of fucking anything… I just needed her and I knew that.   
I moaned slightly as she massaged my scalp.

"I think your enjoying this too much." She coyly replied.  
My head rolled to her touch, my eyes still closed. As she scrubbed the knots and tangles in my dirty hair. I found myself asleep again. I didn't realize I had been asleep until she dunked my head underwater to rinse. I coughed and sputtered. I looked at her, wide-eyed and terrified. She smirked. 

"Asleep again?" she asked.  
I blinked tiredly. Did I fall asleep again? Shit.. I must be tired…. My eyes grew wide when she slicked my wet hair back. As she did so, I realized my hair went past my shoulders.   
"Your hair really grew out didn't it?" she remarked as she stroked her hand through it.  
I wouldn't know. I can't really remember.   
"Would you……. Mind if I cut it? You almost look like a mangy dog or a rock star with that long hair"

My eyes shifted nervously. Then I nodded.   
My angel held up some scissors. Where did she get those? She must have been prepared to ask me that question… I gasped slightly as she snipped away at my hair with them. What was she doing back there?! I found myself shifting in the tub, not even realizing I was moving my body. My angel placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Hidan, relax. I'll only cut it just so it grazes the shoulders. Like it used to be, right?"  
Was that how it used to be? And how did she know..?  
She gave me a small smile. "And it's great your regaining some muscle memory, too! Good job, Hidan."

I blinked fearfully. Good job? Good job? I tried to think of one time I ever remembered my god ever giving me praise for a good job for anything I did for it. Not one fucking time. I remembered I killed so many fucking times for him in a fashion most fitting so it worked for my god. Did my god ever give me any praise…. No. never. After everything I did for it…. And in the end, my god disowned me… god has left me. As if I was nothing. I don't even remember being told good job by anyone else in this planet. That was the first time I ever remember hearing those exact words addressed to me. Shaky as my memory was, I was sure of it. And what was she really congratulating me for? Just because I figured out how to move my body a little? It's not that big of accomplishment. The only real thing of value, I've done in these past eleven years is nothing. I'm still worthless. I don't understand why she bothers with me. 

"Hidan?" my angel asked curiously. She stopped cutting.  
I looked at her.  
"Are you crying?"  
I sniffed. I didn't fucking care if she saw. I was just touched by how much my angel really cared about a piece of shit like me. I really think she was wasting her time with me though. If I was her, I would of left me alone.  
I gasped as my angel brushed my tears out of my eyes.  
She sighed and shook her head. "Sometimes, I wish you would just talk to me…I'm not a mindreader you know.."  
I blinked fearfully.  
"You don't have too. There's no pressure Hidan. Whenever you want to."  
I didn't really want to talk. I remembered how. Of course. My form of human speech was still in tact… but…..Talking hurt me… I'm afraid…. Of what exactly, I don't know. I just don't want to talk. I looked down. My angel sighed. She understood. She stroked my face in compassion and understanding. I closed my eyes to her graceful touch. She then stopped and continued cutting my hair. 

I tried my best to stay awake during this time. I didn't want her hand to slip and risk me having a shaved head. Once in awhile, my eyelids would get heavy. My angel seemed extremely observant of me during this time, and every time that my eyelids drooped or it looked like I was nodding off, she would snap her fingers in front of my face, startling me awake until I drifted off again. After what seemed like hours of being forced to stay awake while she trimmed my hair, she finally said,

"There. Done." She set the scissors down on the floor.

I sighed. A little relieved that she would stop snapping her fingers in my face every time I wanted to sleep. I turned my head to her, a little pleading look on my face.  
Can I go to bed now? Please Angel? I'm fucking tired. My body is warm and I can move my fucking toes. Doesn't mean I haven't cured the damn sleeping habit.

My savoir blinked and stared at me. I was slightly irritated. I want to fucking sleep. What?  
"Been awhile since I've seen your face. Almost forgot how cute you looked."  
I blinked. I was cute? Wait…. She knew me? My angel knew me before? From where…….? I blinked, shocked. If she knew me, she was associated with me. In some way, shape or form. Although I can't remember the terms of our relationship… I know that…. she just wasn't an angel. She's more then that. She knew me before. An associate, or perhaps…. A friend had come and got me. The one person who could remember me. She didn't leave me to rot. Everyone else had forgotten. I felt tears in my eyes again. Dammit. I'm a god damn fucking crybaby. God damn……  
"Hidan?" My angel asked startled. "W-what's wrong?"  
I stared at her. I shook my head. I struggled to reach my trembling hand to my face, to wipe my tears. I missed about five times, before succeeding. My angel took my hand. I looked at her.  
"Good job, Hidan." She said giving a small smile. Congratulating me yet again.  
I don't understand her. Everything about her. Just the grace that she held and even the comfort and support she gives me, her expression always holds an icy quality. But she isn't ice herself. She's so caring, gentle and compassionate. She went out of her way to get me back. For what reason…. Why….. Why…..

My eyelids closed. And I fell asleep there.


	3. Coping with Insanity

Hidan had exhausted himself physically and emotionally. He collapsed unconscious, crying into my arms. I wish I knew what had upset him so much. Was it because I congratulated him for regaining muscle memory… or was it because I complimented his fair looks…? Was his pride so shattered the slightest form of positive encouragement pained him? The way that Hidan looks at me sometimes, I’m not sure if he is scared of me, thankful, or maybe in love with me….. or perhaps it’s a combination of the three. I stared at his face as he slept. I was slightly pleased with myself. I had cleaned eleven years of blood and grime off of his toned skin. The hot water had really got the blood circulating in his body nicely. He no longer looked like a corpse. He was still a little pale, but he looked more like a living person then a dead body. All the dried blood and dirt was cleaned off, and his hair was cut back to nearly the same length as I remember it. He looked the same as he did eleven years ago. Not one part of him has aged. He had no visible wrinkles or any sign of aging. He would have been… at least thirty-three by now. He still looks as young as he was when he entered the Akatsuki lair.

Immortality is a curious thing. I brushed a sliver stand away from his closed eyes. Hidan’s eyelid twitched slightly, but he continued to sleep.

The only thing that was different about him was the visible stitches coursing throughout his body. With the thick layers of blood and dirt completely scrubbed off, I realized that he was covered in large round bruises. Some were darker than others, with various shades of black, blue, yellow and even red. I must have not realized before due to how pale he was. The one on his forehead was the biggest one, colored a horrible shade of black.

Looking at Hidan’s injuries…. In that instant, it all became too real for me. I heard thousands of explosions go off, like multitude of cannonfire. Scattered debris rained down from the sky. Boulders cascaded down, meeting with the sickening sound of crunched flesh. The disgusting smell of decay, and dying…Lying in a pool of your own blood. What horrible pain he must have experienced, such unnecessary pain. No one should have the right to do that to another.

I continued to gently stroke his hair. Hidan rolled his head towards my actions as he slept. He appeared relaxed, but I knew better. His eyes looked weary and ragged. I could see all the pain that hid beneath those eyes. Behind his eyes lay a sad, scared and broken man.

Why did Akatsuki leave him there? Why had we abandoned him? Why did Pein or anyone else care? Why didn’t I care? Why did the Akatsuki, me, everyone else assume him for dead…Why did it take me so long to remember he existed? What if Hidan and Kakuzu hadn’t been defeated, what if we did go to find their bodies.. what if we actually looked into the cause of Sasori’s death? What if we had been a little more careful and didn’t underestimate Konoha… and the other members might of lived as well.. Then I and Hidan wouldn’t be the only ones left of Akatsuki…

 

Questions and “what if’s” pelted the back of my mind in an endless flurry. All these burning questions seared deep into my skull. I couldn’t stop these thoughts of guilt and doubt whenever I stared at his troubled eyes. I felt as if I was solely responsible for his condition.

 

Hidan then hitched his breath sharply at my actions. I gasped, and pulled my hand away from his silver locks. Then I realized my fingertips had lightly grazed his right eyelid. The bump was still there. His face contorted intense pain but began to slowly relax once the pain subsided.

 

I decided I better let him sleep this time. I tortured him enough when he was getting his hair cut. I only forced him to stay awake, for fear I might have cut his head off accidently with the scissors. As I lifted Hidan gently onto the couch, and began to drain the tub, I found myself thinking that I’d have to go shopping later to get Hidan some much needed clothes.

 

I slowly lifted him off me, out of the tub, and began to drain it. As it was draining, I got up, and began to clean up Hidan’s wet silver hair all over the edge of the tub. I was a little grateful he fell asleep. Otherwise, Hidan would be whimpering because I wasn’t with him. He seems to be really afraid of being alone, even if I don’t talk to him much. He just seems to want me around. I can understand why. The poor boy was alone for so long. I disposed of his hair in the trash can, and then came back to Hidan. Rubbing him dry with a towel. I avoided looking at his lower regions. I really had no desire too. Hidan has really suffered enough trauma, and I don’t want to make him feel uncomfortable. Even if he was asleep it felt wrong to me. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what it would be like to betray Hidan’s trust.

 

Hidan snorted and jolted in his sleep when I grazed his ribs with the towel. I suppressed a giggle. Hidan being ticklish. I found it rather cute. I never imagined he’d be the type to be ticklish. Then again… I realized, I really knew nothing about Hidan in the first place. I dried his hair the best I could.

 

I then hesitated. I could wrap him in a towel or a cloak but…. I imagine Hidan would want some clothes. Trapped for that long or not. I tried to think. There wasn’t really anything I wore that would fit him….or that he would want to wear anyway…. I tried to think… Then I remembered…. I’m pretty sure, even though years have passed, I still had some of Pein’s old clothes locked away in the closet. The Deva Path is… I mean…. Was….. a little shorter than Hidan, but not by much. I’m sure he would fit into Pein’s old pants quite nicely. I went to the closet to fetch them. I opened the door. I ignored all of my other clothes and reached to the very back where Pein’s old Akatsuki cloak was. I left it untouched and grabbed a pair of his clean pants.

 

I headed back to Hidan, just as I left him. My eyes shifted and then wondered about getting him some underwear too, but I didn’t have any men’s underwear. We’d have to go shopping later.

I stared at him taking in his body. It was saddening to see such a confident and proud man a shell of pain and bruises. I slipped him into his pants, as fatigue began to set into my body. This was really the last there was of the Akatsuki. A silly girl who could not prevent the death of her closest friend, and a fractured immortal who is psychologically damaged beyond repair. Every death that followed Nagato’s, I could have prevented, No before that. I could have stopped it at its source. If I knew this fate would become of Akatsuki, I would have never let Madara influence Nagato the way he did. After Nagato died, I should have stayed in the Akatsuki.

 

Once Nagato died, I lost my will to be in the organization. I knew that Madara was waiting for an opportunity like this. He took over the Akatsuki as soon as I left. It didn’t need to be this way. I could have stayed, and eliminated Madara and keep the last remaining members safe. At that point, it would just be me and Kisame. It was still worth a try. Everyone in the organization. They all trusted me and respected me. Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Kisame, Kakuzu... and last of all Hidan. Oh Hidan. This was all my fault. If only I took initiative to eliminate Madara sooner. There is no doubt that all of the Akatsuki would be alive. Why didn’t I? What was holding me? It was a very simple answer. I knew I would die if I fought Madara. That was a guarantee. I could have saved all of them. Instead, I chose to be a cowardly little girl. Hiding behind the only friend she had left from the old days. If only Yahiko could see me right now. Digging up the last remaining Akatsuki member only to satisfy my guilt. It doesn’t make up for anything.

 

I rubbed one of my eyes. I wiped away the wetness my eyes left on his chest. “…Hidan, I’m sorry.” I whispered softly. I was saying it more to all of the Akatsuki then to him. Hidan is the last remaining member alive. I must take special care to protect him in his weakened and damaged state.

My head shot up. I immediately detected four strong chakuras advancing towards Amegakure with amazing speed. One of the chakura signatures was immediately recognizable. It was the aura that surrounded Narra Clan Forrest when I entered. “Konoha…” I murmured silently. I expected that Konoha ninja would appear sooner than later, but I never could have predicted that they’d arrive a day after I dug them up.

 

My eyes narrowed. I had to remain calm. The Leaf and the Rain were still under a peace treaty alliance, there is no way that they would risk attacking and breaking that bond after years of wars and fighting. However, I knew exactly what they came here for, and there was no way I was going to let them burry Hidan alive again. I stared at the slumbering immortal beside me. His expression was pained, and his body was still cold. I stood up and covered him gently with three layers of blankets. Hidan gave a small whine in his sleep. I caressed his hair. “Don’t worry.” I said gently. “You won’t need to hide. You are safe here. This is your home now.”

 

It was my way to assure myself. Hidan and I are the last remaining legacy of Yahiko’s Akatsuki. I will not let any of this be in vain. I will not hide behind Nagato or in the shadows anymore. Everyone needs to know and remember, who the Akatsuki were, and what Konoha did. I considered spreading my papers for further surveillance, but there was no need to waste my chakura. I know they will find me. If Konoha bares its fangs first, it will be the many instances of history repeating itself. I won’t set traps, and I will not break the alliance that Nagato believed in. If violence breaks out, it’ll be on Konoha’s hands.

 

It was a matter of minutes before I detected chakura signatures outside the entrance. Without so much as knocking, they busted down the door. How dare they! Three of them searched the building while the last one moved slowly behind them, lighting a cigarette. He was the one who possessed the Nara chakura. I sat at the edge of the couch. Remaining calm. These miscreants invaded my home! Akatsuki’s home. Fingernails dug into my leg. I must remain calm and not let my anger get the better of me.

 

From their movements, it seemed like they did not have a sensory ninja with them. I sat quietly and waited. It was only a few seconds before they surrounded my door. I waited longer. No one seemed ready to knock, they appeared ready for an ambush. I sat, cross-legged, my hands in my lap. It seems they were waiting too.

 

Of course, they were waiting, the cowards. Konoha didn’t want to break their alliance only after they have invaded my home. The hypocrisy of the leaf has carried to its newer generation. Such horrible selfish shinobi. They were waiting for me to attack. They wanted to prove the former Akatsuki member was up to no good. To justify an attack on a current ally. A simple move of my head and I know they’ll crash inside.

 

I won’t give them that satisfaction. I remained still, calm, motionless. The longer time passed, the more anxious they felt. They knew I was aware of their presence but refused to do anything. I’m sure this will make their heads spin.

 

I did not want to wait longer for this game of theirs. “The door is unlocked. From your rude entrance, I assume you know how doors work.” I stated bitterly.

 

There was a pause.

 

The Nara clan member motioned for the shinobi to stand down. They arranged in a line formation behind him. They were on guard. I glared at the door, waiting to see what they’ll do. The Narra member took a drag from his cigarette and knocked on my door.

 

Knocked?! After bursting down the door, and breaking my things? After all that he knocks? I felt my rage building inside me. I calmly stood up, and opened the door. Glaring face to face with the tired angry eyes of a bearded man. I knew immediately who this man was. He would sit to the Hokage’s side in many world meetings. Few often I have attended in the past, but since I was a former Akatsuki member, they required me to attend almost every single one since Nagato’s death. Despite Naruto Uzumakis words that Nagato believed in so dearly, the Leaf likes to hold a gasp over those they feel threatened by.

 

“…Shikamaru Nara. Adviser to the Seventh Hokage.” My words sounded more bitter then I intended them to be.

 

“To what do I owe this home intrusion?” I questioned coldly.

 

The boy took a drag from his cigarette. I wrinkled my nose. “Refrain from doing that indoors.”

The Nara boy looked coldly to me. “Apologies ma’am.” His voice carried a raspy and lazy dull quality. I do not believe I ever heard him speak before. He was examining me from head to toe. “But it keeps my head clear and helps me think.”

 

“Refrain from doing that indoors.” I repeated.

 

“Why are you wearing that?” The boy burned eyes into my Akatsuki cloak. “It’s rather suspicious for an ex-terrorist to be wearing her old uniform.” I glared harshly.

 

“The uniform is not old. I understand that the Akatsuki has hurt people in the past. I do not apologize for any of it. Yahiko is the one who founded the Akatsuki. The red clouds on the robes represent the wars that rained blood upon Amegakure. I will not have you tarnish his memory. I will wear what I like.”

 

“You are aware your little organization your friend founded caused the last great war?”

“Anything the Akatsuki have done under Madara does not represent our organization. The Leaf might have animosity towards me, and the Akatsuki, but these robes provide a symbol of hope for Amegakure, and a proud part of our country’s history.”

 

“It’s interesting you say that. I’ve never seen you wear them at the summit meetings.”

“You know as well as I do that would be a bad idea.”

 

“I just find it suspicious you’re wearing them now, when another Akatsuki member supposedly went missing at the same day.”

 

“All former Akatsuki members are dead.” I replied coldly. Get to the point.

 

Shikamaru moved his way inside the room, ignoring me. “You have something that belongs to me.” I glared harshly at the young man.

 

“Konoha needs a warrant from the Hokage to authorize searches of civilian buildings in foreign nations. Pray that you have one.”

 

Shikamaru’s eyes narrowed towards the sleeping exhausted albino man lying on my couch. I slowly walked towards Hidan, and sat down on the couch with him. The Nara Clan boy’s eyes didn’t wander. His eyes seemed to burn into the back of Hidan’s skull. Hoping as if his look could kill the immortal a second time. The Advisor’s eyes shifted to me, examining me with contempt.

 

“This was a very stupid move of you.” Shikamaru said plainly, rage evident on his face. This boy truly hated Hidan for killing his mentor. “I expected more of an effort to hide the bod…” his voice trailed, noticing the very subtle rising and falling of the pale zealot’s chest. 

 

“He’s still alive!?!” He looked enraged. His bodyguards gathered behind him, advancing around me.

“Leave now.” I told them harshly.

 

“You violated the Leaf and Amegakure peace treaty! You took property from sacred lands!”

“Hidan is not a property. Leave. I have not seen a warrant. You do not have the right to take anything from me.”

 

Shinobi closed in around me. “Hidan is our property, you dug him up from my land and brought him here. You violated the treaty, you are revising the Akatsuki. We don’t need a warrant. We will stop this at the source!!”

 

“Does the Hokage Naruto Uzumaki even know you are here!” I raised my voice. Surely that naïve boy wouldn’t let this happen. Naruto Uzumaki. You talked so highly of peace. Yet here is your adviser, treating me like a criminal. It’s obvious he is the one controlling the peace. It’s as Nagato said, Peace is only achievable when it’s in the hands of one person. This Shikamaru boy was handling everything from the shadows, it’s clear to me, Naruto was nothing more than a figurehead. Nagato didn’t die for this. Yahiko didn’t die for this! All of the Akatsuki, old and new, did NOT die for this.

 

Four of the shinobi surrounded Hidan and attempted to take him. My eyes turned wide, and I blasted them away with a paper barrier, enveloping me and Hidan in a cocoon. A cascade of papers swirled around us. Enveloping us in a deadly shell of paper. I clutched to the fractured immortal, holding him close to me as I could, as the cocoon isolated the angry shouts of Shinobi around us. All that can be heard was the spinning of the millions of papers outside. Deadly to anyone who gets close.

 

Konoha will not take the last of the Akatsuki. Never again. He has suffered enough. We have suffered enough!

 

“GIVE ME HIM! HE DESERVES TO ROT IN HIS GRAVE!” The Nara’s voice shrieked over the massive amounts of whirring papers.

 

“LEAVE US ALONE!” I raged. “HE DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU!”

 

To my surprise, my paper cocoon broke open. Long black threads stitched and seemed it’s way into the cracks and forced my fortress open like a candy ball. Shadows?

 

I prepared myself to kill this child if I have to. Then a blood curdling scream sounded right in my ear. Everyone froze.

 

I turned my head like a shot and Hidan was screaming, his eyes wide, in a panic, breathing heavy and going into shock. I held him. “Hidan, Hidan, Hidan.” I kept repeating his name and caressing his hair, attempting to calm him. I felt millions of eyes on me. Angry, scared, and tense chakura filled the room, the atmosphere was suffocating. I kept my focus on Hidan, but kept myself insanely aware of the positions of the men in the room.

 

“Hidan, shh, shh, you’re okay…” I whispered softly. “I’m sorry I woke you.” As if talking to an infant. “Please, please, I need you to be calm.” I hoped desperately that if this Nara boy needed a reason for me to keep Hidan. This was my opportunity. Perhaps if this boy sees the effect he had on Hidan, he will leave us alone. I pleaded that Hidan, remain calm, but in his damaged state, I have no idea how he’ll react to the man who imprisoned him.

“Please calm down…” I cooed to the screaming child.

 

\----------------------------------

 

I couldn’t see anything… my vision was clouded red… maggots, worms and other insects crawled around my ears and eyes, eating away at my decomposing flesh… The smell of rotting flesh assaulted my senses in the darkness…I realized it was my smell… disgusting…surrounded by the raw stench of my own filth, lying in a thick pool of my own blood. Dirt filled my lungs, nose, ears and mouth. My eyes trailed crimson streaks to my ice blue lips as the maggots ate out my glazed over-eyes. I could barely register the pain. I was nothing… Always nothing, and becoming nothing once again. Feast away you fuckin’ maggots. Sorry your last meal has to be a miserable piece of shit… I could feel myself growing weaker and weaker … let me fade away into nothingness…. Let me die…

 

……

 

“That so-called-god ….-sama isn’t your good anymore, I am. The only one passing on judgment is me.”

A flash of white, searing pain, my body was ripped apart and shattered. I fucking screamed as the pain engulfed me, rocks came pelting on my detached organs from every angle. I screamed and cursed and fucking cringed as the explosion ranged on. It was endless. The pain never stopped. The echo upon echo of explosions reeled in my mind and the pain felt too intense.

 

…..

 

My bloodshot eyes snapped open and I heard a hoarse, desperate and terrified scream. My breathing became heavy and ragged and I realized it was my scream…. My…..

I could hear voices but they all sounded so far away over the noise that left my throat. Cold sweat drained my body.

 

A trembling hand reached up stroked my Adam’s apple.. I could feel a thick row of stitches across my neck… I traced them gingerly…then lowered my hand and sighed deeply. My voice didn’t even sound like my own.

 

I blinked tiredly…. I realized my Angel was staring above me, holding my face. My vision was coming into focus. My angel. I found my body still trembling. Echoes of what happened to me lingering into my mind. The explosion, the years buried, the darkness, the feeling of decomposing and fading away into nothingness.

 

“Calm down, you’re safe now…” she cooed gently. I leaned my body to hers, feeling her warmth and comfort.

 

“Take him.”

 

My eyes shot open wide. A chill ran through my body.

 

“Hidan…?” a soft voice sounded so far away.

 

I… knew that voice. That voice… that voice. someone was in the way, who is she, push her, push her. Have to see. Need to see. In view. That face. Cold eyes. Ponytail. Cigarette. Bombs. Explosions. Screaming. Crying. Hot rage. White fear. Devil in its human form.

 

“That so called God Jashin-sama isn’t your god anymore. I am. And the only one passing down judgement is me.”

 

Millions of explosions pelted my mind in an encore wave of flurry. Staring at this man as if he owned the world in his hands. Millions of emotions flooding back. Feelings. Rage. I couldn’t think, I couldn’t feel. All I knew the next minute were frightened screams of panic and I felt sharp pain all over my body. The feeling of shadow strangling jutsu.

 

I screamed and cried and cursed and thrashed. I needed to hurt him. I had to destroy him. I want him gone. I want him gone. Die die die die die. Tears ran down my face and rage filled hoarse screams sounded through my throat I tried to bite him. I made hard contact with flesh. It bled.

The taste of blood. Ritual. Ritual. I remember. I think I know. I moved, almost free. I felt hands on both sides of my face. I snarled at the person in front of me. Amber Eyes. Wet Amber eyes. Crying. Angel. Holding my face. Blood… Red. Her ear. A large chunk of her ear bitten off.. Who did that… who hurt my angel?.... It was that man! That devil man! I was shaking. Where was he? Where was he.. My eyes searched frantically…. He was gone… What happened… Did I imagine this? What..?

Angel was crying… No… No… No.. Angel no, don’t cry… I wiped her tears with my hands… I was free… when did that happen….

 

She hugged me tightly. I leaned to her shoulder. All of a sudden, my eyes felt heavy. As fast as I had the burst of energy, all the energy drained from my body once that pineapple head was no longer around. I closed my eyes, and passed out.

 

\-------------------------------------

 

The instant that Nara boy opened his mouth. I knew it was bad news. Hidan’s eyes became wide. Like after eleven years of sleeping he was finally awake. He pushed me away, possessing more strength then I ever saw him before since I dug him up.

“Hidan?” I called to him, but he didn’t seem to hear me. He was focused only on one thing.

His eyes met with Shikamaru, and his whole body trembled. Every conceivable emotion was running through his eyes. Anger, fear, horror, rage, it was a typhoon of pure hatred and trauma. I never felt bloodlust so strongly in his chakura before.

With nothing but adrenaline and hatred in his veins, he screamed and lunged at the boy like a rapid dog.

 

“Hidan!!!” I transformed into paper, hoping to restrain him but I was a second too late. The Nara boy held him in a shadow strangle jutsu. Pure hatred in his eyes.

 

“We will be taking him back to Konoha, and charging you for treason!”

I materialized in front of Shikamaru. “You will not!”

 

Hidan was thrashing madly, unworldly screams escaping his throat. Clawing, biting, screaming. He was a caged animal. Shikamaru’s eyes widened as shadows from his jutsu were snapping off Hidan’s body. Hidan was breaking the jutsu with pure strength.

 

“LEAVE. LEAVE NOW.” I stated, holding the thrashing rabid albino back with my hands as well as my papers.

 

“Hidan, calm down.” I caressed his hair in attempt to calm him. Hidan screamed and raged at me. As if he didn’t see me. The only thing that mattered was his vengeance.

 

“I am not leaving without him.”

 

“Foolish child. Do you not see what you have done here? Leave or you will surely die.”

“Surround her.” He commanded his men.

 

I have had it. Paper flew at every inch of the room, surrounding the Konoha shinobi. I will make them leave by for-AUGH..

I felt a sharp pain. Hidan’s teeth bit down hard on the side of my face. He held on tightly. He so desperately wished to cause the one who imprisoned him pain. The pain sobered me. I knew what I had to do. I swiftly surrounded everyone in the room within their own paper cocoon. Covering their airways, and constricting their movements, sealing their jutsu. Shikamaru didn’t have time to react, for if he tried to block my papers, he would have had to release Hidan. Something I’m sure the vengeful shinobi did not want to do.

I constricted their airways, and the muffled screaming and thrashing soon transformed into a dull and slow breathing. The room fell still.

 

Hidan’s fangs clung onto me like a Piranha refusing to let go. I winced as pulled him away from my ear, feeling the flesh rip off in his mouth. Tears streamed down my eyes in pain.

 

“Hidan…” I said softly.” Staring into his eyes. He was shaking, snarling. He looked more attune to an animal then man. No recognition showed in his eyes. Fueled only by adrenaline, rage and fear. I held both sides of his face. “Hidan, Hidan. Please, let go. Calm down. This poor child. I do not condone Hidan’s actions for wanting revenge. He has suffered for so long. However, this is not the time or the place. Hidan will get his revenge.

I felt my eyes a bit wet. I could not stand to see a member of Akatsuki suffer for so long. Hidan blinked and stopped snarling at me.

 

“Ah..” a flash of recognition showed in his eyes… he wiped my tears with his thumb curiously. I gave a soft laugh and held his hand. He willed himself to walk and be active just to try to slit his Gravekeepers throat. He stared at me as if he did not know what occurred. He stared at my ear. He did not know why his mouth tasted of blood or why my ear was bleeding. In his muddled mind, the two events are not connected. His eyes searched the room for the Nara boy. He was shaking. “Hidan, it’s okay. He’s gone.” I whispered softly.

 

A small lie. But a lie he needed. The Hokage’s adviser was safely wrapped in my cocoon. Hidan can’t sense his chakura signature. He won’t be casting jutsu anytime soon either.

 

Hidan’s body shook once more, and his weight collapsed onto me. All adrenaline leaving his body and leaving him with nothing. I gently moved him back to his sofabed.

I held my ear. A huge chunk was missing. I could repair it. I swirled healing papers over my ear and held them there. I bitterly eyed the shaking cocoons on the floor. They were losing air. My nose wrinkled in distain. I should just let them suffocate. Suffocate like Hidan has for eleven years.

 

Shikamaru was Hidan’s kill. I will not deny him his justice. I opened a flap of paper near their mouths so they could breathe.

 

Shikamaru took a huge gasp of air. The boy must have realized at this moment he was outclassed.

“Listen and Listen well, Shikamaru Nara of the Leaf.” I spoke firmly. “This man is very unlike the Hidan you knew. You induced years of trauma and psychological damage to a former member of the Akatsuki. As my former teammate I came back to rescue him. I do not have plans to revise the Akatsuki at least in the way you think. Hidan was an Akatsuki member long before he became ‘Konoha’s Property.’ Legally, I have every right to have him here. He will not cause trouble for the Leaf. He will serve under Amegakure’s protection as an official shinobi of our country.”

Shikamaru opened his mouth to speak.

“Speak your words carefully child. They may be your last.”

 

The boy wisely shut up.

 

“……” I paused. “You will tell Naruto Uzumaki what happened here. As the kage of Amegakure, I refuse to speak to you again until you come back here with the Hokage.”

With those words, I flew out the window at high speed, carrying Shikamaru and his men with me. I hurled their bodies into the direction of Konoha, flinging them like a slingshot. Their paper caccons broke open seconds before they hit the ground as they got further away from my chakura. I watched Shikamaru and his men land on their feet in the branches of the trees. They traversed in the direction of Konoha. I hope that fall seriously injured them. 

I glared at the horizon. That Shikamaru Nara. What a truly detestable man. He reminded me of Hanzo. Cowardly and doing everything possible to keep himself in an assured position of power. Nagato had faith in Naruto Uzumaki. So, I will give that boy one final chance. If Naruto remains ignorant of the actions of his adviser, I will personally have to take matters into my own hands.

I held my head. All this stress was producing a migraine. I slowly flew my way inside, and sat on the couch where Hidan stayed. I stared at the damaged man, and closed my eyes.

There was so much I had to do. I had to clean the mess those ingrates made, cook a hearty meal for Hidan, buy clothes, think of what to do if Shikamaru comes back with the intent to kill….Hidan trembled in his sleep. I caressed his hair gingerly. But I did not want to trouble my mind with such burdens.

 

For now, all that matters, is that I defended our home. The Akatsuki will rise again, however broken and miserable we might be. The red cloud will never die, as long as there is hope.


End file.
